Saturday, July 18, 2009
When Resentment Teaches Me Gratitude
I had the most wonderful day yesterday. The best in a long time. It was a day spent in reflection, meditation, organizing and cleaning my own house, followed by teaching Reiki later in the afternoon...not to mention the joy of picking up a beautiful kitchen table that was gifted to us by dear friends.
The last 4-6 weeks have been spent doing the things I had to do (with love I might add) in order to rearrange Marshall Creek Center and get our new renters settled in. It has been a push to get it all done, and a stretch to eeak out time for my own needs and pay attention to my precious home and sacred work.
Yesterday was a full day...non stop until I went to bed at 10 or so, but I felt at peace and rested through the day, I also feel rested here at work today. Just goes to show what a difference it makes in our energy levels when we tend to where our heart and soul is calling us.
We live on three acres in the Santa Cruz Mountains. There are three cottages on the land. Two of the cottages are nestled between a lively year round creek (Marshall Creek) and a hilly spine that heads up a gulch. The third cottage rests on top the the hilly spine.., this is our home. One of the cottages along the creek (below our home) is rented to an awesome couple who are good neighbors. The second cottage is the home of Marshall Creek Center for Wellness and Healing (MCC). MCC is primarily ran by my husband Steve... though I also have spent many hours doing manual labor in the upkeep of these homes, as we cannot afford to hire help in this matter.
At times I find myself becoming resentful that so much of my energy is drawn to the cottages below, when what I really want is to make and create my own home. Then I take a deep breath and remember that I love the grounds of MCC, it is part of my home. The creek, the Redwood and Laurel trees, the scent of forest...all of this awaits me when I come home. And when I step out the door of my home in the morning, I am greeted by the smell of damp earthy wholeness and the views of strong, tall, well rooted trees, who walk down the hill with me and embrace me before I get into my car to drive off to work. When I remember this I am grateful for all that I have and all that I am able to give in exchange.